


The love I have for you

by boohoo_cracker



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Video Blogging RPF, mcyt
Genre: Fluff, Gen, M/M, hospital au, vibes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-13 23:42:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29659119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boohoo_cracker/pseuds/boohoo_cracker
Summary: With Tubbo finally out of hospital, he now deals with school, an uninterested brother and a certain kid who he seems determined on befriending. And Tommy. But he always has to deal with Tommy.That would never stop... right?Meanwhile, a romance unfolds between a certain doctor and a panda eyed patient. Nothing can go wrong there.
Relationships: Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), Dream SMP Ensemble & Sleepy Bois Inc., Karl Jacobs/Sapnap, Ranboo & Tubbo & TommyInnit
Comments: 42
Kudos: 13





	1. Five minutes

**Author's Note:**

> I DO NOT SHIP ‘KARL’ AND ‘NICK’. I FIND ‘SAPNAP’ AND ‘KARL JACOBS’ VERY CUTE THO. PLEASE DONT PUSH THE SHIP IN THEIR FACES THATS AWFUL. SAME GOES FOR DREAM AND GEORGE (there’s a background romance there - if you want to read their fic, it’s on my dash :))   
> DO NOT SHIP ANY OF SBI (PLUS RANBOO AND TUBBO). MANY FIND IT WEIRD, PHIL IS MARRIED. DONT BE WEIRDCHAMP. 
> 
> I have a Twitter! @SqiggySturdust go follow me if u wanna interact :D  
> If the cc’s read this please let me jump off a cliff (safely (I’d do it just to prove a point also that sounds really fun maybe this wasn’t the best analogy)) 
> 
> I used this Tumblr blog: https://smp-boundaries.tumblr.com/post/611044520230109184/smp-creator-boundaries-masterpost to find out people’s comfort levels on fics and shipping. Just wanted to be sure, I don’t wanna do anything ppl aren’t comfortable with :)  
> Alright. Enjoy!

Tubbo takes a deep breath in, smelling the sharp sterilisation and faint metallic scent of the hospital. For - maybe - the last time.   
That's probably a little too much to hope for.   
"Tubbo! You coming?" His brother, J, yells out, waiting in the reception as he trails the corridor listlessly. Tubbo clears his throat.   
"Uh- Yeah! I just forgot something in my- the room, go wait in the car! I'll be like, 5 minutes!” He hears J mutter something under his breath, but Tubbo doesn't care.   
No more chemo. No more endless blood tests, no more wondering whether or not he would wake up from his sleep.   
No more.   
He runs down the corridor, pacing back to the oh so familiar room, where he'd had half of his childhood. Tubbo was going to miss it, but if he could never come back here, there was no choice. Tubbo opens the door with a gentle push, wincing as the metallic cleaning scent grew stronger.   
𝘑𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘢 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥𝘣𝘺𝘦.  
The lights were off, and there was an abandoned mop lying on the floor.   
And a boy. There was a boy in his room.   
He raps lightly on the wall, startling the boy - perhaps 16, 17 with dark blonde hair.   
“Hello?” The boy looks up, twisting something on his wrist.   
“Hi. Uh- who are you?” Tubbo walks forward, smiling at him.   
“I’m Tubbo. I uh.. used to stay here.” The boy looks at him blankly. He twists the thing on his wrist again, shifting uncomfortably.   
“And we are.. where?”  
“Um.” Tubbo moves back, heading back towards the door. “Let me just go get a doctor..” The boy hisses, jerking back into the corner. “Or not.”   
“No doctor..” Tubbo bites his cheek.   
“Alright, no doctor. What’s your name?” He swallows, eyeing Tubbo suspiciously.   
“Ranboo.” He says finally. Tubbo inches a little closer, reaching out an arm and carefully grabbing Ranboo’s wrist. He flinches, but doesn’t pull away. There’s a small medical bracelet on his wrist, that’s been crumpled at twisted, but still pretty clear. Tubbo reads the bracelet, then frowns.   
“You come from this hospital.” Ranboo shakes his head, mystified.   
“See, look.” Tubbo rolls up his sleeve, showing him his own wristband. “Leukaemia. Was a regular patient.” Ranboo shakes his head again.   
“I.. no. I don’t know how I’m here.”   
“If I get a doctor-“ Ranboo flinches away from him, shuffling against the wall.   
“Please. No doctor.” It was a mere whimper.   
“Ranboo..” he jerks up at the sound of his name. “Big Q- um Doctor Quackity, that is, he’s my friend. He’s a great guy, great doctor.”  
“He won’t..”   
“He can help! I’m sure you’ll be in the system, and Big Q’s good with uh..”   
Problems? Teenagers? People?  
“Situations.” He finishes. “If you just stay here, I’ll go find him.”  
“Stay here.” Tubbo nods, walking toward the door.   
“Stay there. I’ll be back in.. 5 minutes?” Ranboo whispers an ‘okay’ before Tubbo walks out. He slides to the floor, rocking back and forth, chanting to himself: “five minutes. Five minutes. Five minutes. Good doctor. Five minutes.”  
𝘍𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘵𝘦𝘴.


	2. My love, his life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karlnap.   
> and some angst.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back babbayyyy   
> sorry i wasnt here, felt a little deflated since I write out a reaaal long chapter then realised it went nowhere and was crappy
> 
> also i was sick but IM FINE NOW :D  
> i'll be rambling more at the end but yeah! enjoy!

Karl curls up on the sofa.   
“Hey, love.” Karl flinches and a soft hand brushes against his forehead. “Are you okay?” He looks up at his boyfriend, Sapnap and smiles bitterly.  
“I’m fine. Well, no. That’s a lie” A small frown creases Spanap’s face and Karl sighs, stretching his arms. “It’s been a year.”  
“A year since-? Oh. 𝘖𝘩.”   
“Yeah.” A knot twists in Karl’s stomach. It was always a stiff topic, bringing up an ex. But it was even worse to bring up an ex who had died, because of Karl.   
Not that anyone believed him when he said that.   
“Do you..” his fingers trail up into Karl’s fluffy hair. “Are you going to do anything?”   
Karl hesitates, then shakes his head. “I’ll just be staying home, watching reruns of..” he turns on the tv, skipping through some channels. “America’s Next Top Model. Or maybe something else.” Sapnap bites his lip, before kissing his forehead and grabbing his keys.   
“Ok. Don’t do anything too stupid while I’m gone.”  
“I promise.” He says, mouth curling into a smile, glancing up at Sapnap for a moment. “Have fun at work.” He winks at Karl in reply (who blushes, even after nearly three months of dating steadily) and heads out the door, shutting it gently behind him.   
Karl lets out a puff of air. Alone again.   
—  
It’s a rare day. No work, no worries, Also known as a Sunday, however Karl didn’t get a lot of Sunday’s at his job. Even though he was barely out of medicine school, and still only a junior doctor, he barely has a second of free time. 

Karl spends it by lying down on the couch, scrolling through Twitter on his laptop. 

He frowns as he gets a notification for James - he’d signed in a couple days ago to check his email, and had never signed in again.   
“Hey James?” He enters the squashed living room, smiling brightly at Karl.   
“Yeah, love?” Karl blushes at the nickname but clears his throat, reading through the email again.   
“Why didn’t you go to the appointment yesterday?” The smile slid straight from James’ face.   
“I forgot.” He says quickly. Too quickly. Karl narrows his eyes.   
“𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦-“   
“I know! I know!” Karl sighs, and pushes his computer away, standing up and staring at him, so close they were almost nose to nose.   
“You have a brain tumour, James! That’s not a joke- a game!” He prods his finger into his chest. “This kills. You can’t keep doing this to me!” James’ face flushes red.   
“To you? To 𝘺𝘰𝘶? I’m the one with this deadly disease! I’m the one that’s going to die from it! You can walk away from this, I can’t. I just have to draw out the pain, the suffering with whatever new medication doctors dream up!”   
“Maybe I will then!” James raises his eyebrows. “Walk away! If you’re going to let this happen..-“ he pushes James away, gathering up his coat and laptop. “- I am not going to help you.” He runs out the room, and out of James' apartment, and only once he gets to the elevator does he realise what exactly he’s done.   
He's such an idiot.  
He's not going to 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦.  
Karl runs back to the apartment, letting his laptop bag and coat drag behind him and he hammers on the door. The door opens, and James stands behind it, raising his eyebrows.   
"I'm sorry." He blurts out.   
"It's okay." Karl replies softly. "I'm in the wrong too." James turns away from the door, walking back into his apartment. Karl follows after him, depositing is coat and bag at the door.   
"It's just.. You're Karl." Karl blinks.  
"Yes I am that."   
"But you're also Doctor Jacobs."   
"Okay?" James groans.   
"This isn't making sense. I love you, but I want to be 𝘶𝘴. James and Karl. Not a patient and a doctor." Karl touches his arm.  
"We can do that. We can be us."   
"You won't be a doctor?" James says, in a small voice, looking down at his feet.   
"Well, not at home, no."   
"With me?" James amends, taking his hand and grasping it.   
"Not with you." Karl giggles. "Unless you're into that." James snorts, grinning, pulling Karl closer to him.   
"You're unbelievable."   
"But you love me."   
"But I love you." James draws their lips together and Karl wakes up in cold sweat. 

just a dream just a dream just a dream just a dream-  
not a dream.  
a memory.   
From when, Karl wasn't sure. All he knew is that he couldn't stay 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦, pretending everything was fine when it was all going to shit. Karl pushes himself off of his sofa, stuffing on his shoes and heads out the door.   
He needs to get away.   
\--  
He brushes the stone, feeling the grooves against his fingers. Karl clears his throat, letting his fingers drop.   
"Hey, love." his voice is still hoarse. Karl clears his throat again, lifting up a bouquet of flowers to his chest. "Hey, love. I'm here. I'm back."   
He waits for an answer but of course he wouldn't get one. It's a little hard to strike up a conversation with a tombstone, with a corpse.   
"I would never leave you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so excited for tsmp holyyy  
> ik it was a little short but again i was kinda sick and felt unmotivated so i needed a small chapter to cope with baha  
> ANGST ANGST ANGST LETS GO  
> maybe you guys are knowing where this may go? 
> 
> waggle le eyebrows 
> 
> also if you havent already read WTDO and extension its on my dash thisll make more sense ahah  
> oki love you all <333


	3. 5 Years Ago | There's nothing wrong

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set five years in the past, the clingy duo playing catch.   
> tw of blood, fainting and leukaemia! be warned!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy :]

There's a hammering on his door. Tubbo shakily moves towards the door, wincing as one of his arms moved. He'd been sore for a while. At a practice a while ago, he'd fallen weirdly on the trampoline, and for the past month or so, all Tubbo's joints had been aching. But still, it was nothing. He'd done this before - he'd probably do it again! It's just.. never been this bad.   
Tubbo threw open the door, and saw his best friend, about to punch the door again.   
"Hey! You're back!" Tommy grins, bouncing a ball between his hand.   
"Yeah, just got back from the airport." Tubbo steps down the front steps and smiles back at his friend.   
"How was it?" Tommy frowns a little, his smile dimming.   
"Well, it was okay. Wilbur was all for blowing up Athens and Techno just wanted to go to 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘶𝘮 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳, but we went to a couple beaches. Tubbo glances down at Tommy's shoes.   
"Yes, you've got a bit of a sock tan there." Tommy looks down too, glaring as he pulls up his socks.   
"We never mention this."   
Tubbo merely laughs, wiping sweat off of his brow. Tommy squints at him, as if scanning him in his mind.   
"You seem different. Paler." Tubbo rolls his eyes.   
"I'm fine. Where are we going?"   
Tommy shrugs, leading the way to their local park. He bounces the ball towards Tubbo, who catches it and bounces it back to Tommy.   
See that was fine.   
He was fine.   
There was nothing wrong.   
They chat, catching Tommy up on things he's missed ("I can't believe J's going to University next year!") and Tommy tells tales of his family's long trip around Greece ("We actually went snorkelling, and Dad says if we go back when we're older, we can go scuba diving!"). Tubbo takes off his jumper, while Tommy teases him - "Who even wears a jumper in August?"   
"I do. I was cold, okay!" Tommy snorts, and then stares at Tubbo's arm.   
"What's that?" He asks, prodding something. Tubbo turns his arm to look at it and sees a large, angry bruise on the side of his arm. He rubs it self consciously.   
"I don't know. I don't remember where that came from." Tommy inspects it closer.   
"Looks painful."   
"It's fine, Tommy." He insists, and Tommy shrugs, dropping it.   
And it was fine.   
Because he was fine.   
And there was nothing wrong. 

"YOOO, I'm so good at this game!" Tommy shouts, running around the basketball court, holding his hand out as though he was high fiving the air. Tubbo grins, picking up the fallen ball and attempting to shoot a goal - it hits the backboard and bounces off, hitting the floor. He takes a breath in, shivering and wiping away the sweat on his forehead. There's some sweat running down his nose, too. Tommy runs back around to pick up the ball, making to throw it to Tubbo, but instead of throwing it, it drops to the ground. Tommy's eyes widen.   
"What's.. what- Tubbo you've got a nosebleed." Tubbo wipes his nose cautiously, looking at the bright red on his finger.   
"Are you- are you sure you're okay?" Tubbo nods shakily, then harder and smiles tightly.   
Because he's fine.   
He's 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘦.   
And there's nothing wrong.   
Tommy bites his cheek then reaches out, grimacing as he touches Tubbo's forehead.   
"You're kind of clammy." Tubbo jerks away from Tommy's hand.   
"It's okay, Tommy. 𝘐'𝘮 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘦."   
"You're fine." He looks unconvinced.   
"I'm fine."   
Tommy stares at Tubbo again. Tubbo stares back. He's got a ringing headache. Everything seems a little muzzy.  
He's so tired.   
And his eyes can just shut.. oh, so easily.   
"I feel dizzy.."   
He shivers again, in the light breeze.   
"Tubbo.." Tubbo shuts his eyes, swaying slightly. He hears Tommy shouting his name. And then it all goes dark.  
Maybe he's not fine.   
Maybe.. Maybe there's something wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I liked writing this.   
> I am going back to schl next week (proper schl) so updates will be slower!! Im sorry for that, but I hope you'll like whats coming up (and I'll try and churn out some chapters this weekend)   
> I HOPE YOU LIKED!! 
> 
> ALSO I NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO ABOUT TOMMY AND TFTSMP AND TUBBO AND THEORYS AND YEAH SO @sqiggystardust is my Twitter! feel free to dm me :D  
> also I used to have discord but its decided to die and crash and burn (im also uncomfortable with vcing so id be chatting on servers and in dms mostly! Imma make a new one soon :)

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Hope you liked!  
> Kudos and comments are appreciated, but by no means necessary lol   
> I TRY and update this every few days, so stay tuned!


End file.
